I was sitting in AJ's before lunch tweaking a paper for Anglo-Saxon, and a friend stopped by to say hello. We chatted for a bit and, as so often happens here, the discussion turned from weekend plans to abstract concepts. Well, I thought it was abstract concepts, but the issue was more personal for him than I knew. It seemed like suddenly: "You don't understand how angry you just made me, Mary." His face turned a little red--an angry red but not a furious red--and he clammed up and wouldn't listen to anything I had to say, even my apologies. He walked off.
I thought I should feel bad about it, so I stared at the table for about thirty seconds. Then I realized that I wasn't upset at all--as far as I could tell it had been a friendly conversation the whole time. I shrugged and went back to my paper. (It was about 11:15 and the paper was sort of due at 2:30.)
Someone else walked up, and I'm not sure how to describe him without plastering his identity online. I don't know that I've talked to him enough to call him a friend, but we're friends on facebook. I have one class with him, but mostly when we talk, we talk business. I always got the feeling that he didn't like me much.
"Hey, Mary, do you know who that was?"
"Yeah, that was" and I told him my friend's name.
"Yeah, I know it was him, but is everything okay? I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but it sounded kind of awkward."
I shrugged. "Yeah, he's one of my friends. I'll give him some time to cool off then I'll go apologize."
He gave a small laugh, a "heh-heh," one with two breaths. The first was nervous and the other relieved. "Okay. I just wanted to make sure you were okay."
"I'm okay." I nodded. He started to turn. "Thank you," I told him.
And that was that.
This happens to me more often that I'd like. Sometimes I have no clue why the man I love is upset. Later, I talk to him about it and then most of the time it makes sense, but sometimes it never does. Part of love is loving despite these mysteries. Mrs. Batson used to say, "Let it go. Just let it go." That's good advice.
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