why don't *you* die, then?

Fresh Hopes and Concerns As Fetal DNA Tests Advance
By Rob Stein
Washington Post Staff Writer
Sunday, October 26, 2008; Page A01

Doctors have started using powerful new DNA tests to screen fetuses for a wider range of genetic abnormalities, spotting more problem pregnancies early but stirring fears that the results will increase abortions as well as confuse and needlessly alarm many couples.

Sometimes I wonder how you can extract DNA from a fetus, test it for genetic abnormalities, and not recognize it as human.

According to the article, Arthur L. Beaudet is the chair of Baylor's Department of Molecular and Human Genetics. The article quotes him:

"Some of these disorders are quite burdensome. They require lifelong nursing care. In some cases these children never walk, never talk, never feed themselves," Beaudet said. "It can have a major impact on the family. People say, 'I wish you had given me the opportunity to know ahead of time. It's really destroyed our lives.' That's why women want to know."

This is really not cool.

I understand that love is difficult. I utterly fail at it all the time. But why must we be cowards? Why can't we step up, be courageous, and love people who are difficult to love?

thoughts while cramming for a current events quiz

Friday, October 24, 2008
Gender equality in military debated
Women cannot hold some posts in U.S. forces, angering advocates of same treatment for sexes.
Jerome L. Sherman / Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

I'm going to let Jason (the Marine) speak. Quotes (with permission) are directly from gmail chat or aim, cleaned for grammar and language.

Women aren't allowed on submarines: "they're not allowed to surface for 3 months. Think of all the guys on board of a sub not allowed to be surfaced with women there."

Women aren't allowed in infantry or cavalry, "basically not allowed in combat." Jason said "You know how bad I feel when women get hit? Imagine how bad I'd feel if they get shot, blown up, anything of that sort." Do most Marines feel that way? "Most of them do. However, there are a lot of female Marines that can kick f---in a--. And all Marines are allowed in combat if there's an attack, so female Marines have fought and died. They're put through the exact same test as the men."

"These women aren't asking for special privileges," said Manning, a Navy veteran. "We think women and men should be allowed to do any job they are physically qualified to do."

What Manning--and most people--miss is that this isn't an issue of physical strength. Sure, men tend to be physically stronger, but there are plenty of women who are physically stronger than plenty of men. Those men who are lower on the "physical strength" scale aren't going to join the Marines. Keeping women from combat has nothing to do with lack of physical strength. This is the United States Marine Corps--if you're not physically strong, you're not going to finish basic training, regardless of sex.

I sent this quote to Jason, and he said "Women can kill people like the best of 'em. Just when they start getting hurt, people freak out." What do you mean by "freak out"? Jason said "If you and I were getting shot at, and you got shot, I would freak out and be more concerned about helping you than shooting back." Are a lot of Marines like this?

"Like this? It's why they don't allow it."

Jason continued: "Also, you have to get into some pretty dirty situations in the field, including field hygiene, involving quickly pulling down clothes, using baby wipes to clean the four important parts, and getting clothed again in less than a minute."

Why are people so upset about it? "They don't want to see women dying. It would be all over the TV. And women would be targeted."

And what about basic training? Men and women go through the same training, Jason said, but they're separated. "Three months of intense training and spewing testosterone can make you really want a woman, and if they're in easy access that can lead to huge problems," Jason said.

No need to be insulted.

Prominent former priest convicted of abusing boy

It really upsets me that the rest of us get a bad name because of the actions of a few. This isn't what the Catholic Church teaches.

It really upsets me when people get angry at the church or hate the church or leave the church because of the actions of a few. This isn't what the Catholic Church is.

It really upsets me when people say or assume or joke that all priests are like this. Most of them are not. Most of them are really awesome.

No takers for contest that requires abstinence
The Associated Press
Thursday, October 23, 2008; 8:56 PM
ATLANTA -- A contest that would pay $10,000 to an engaged couple, as long as they abstain from premarital sex, hasn't gotten any takers. The deadline for the Marriage for a Lifetime contest is Oct. 31. The prize includes free flowers, invitations and other wedding treats.

I thought this was interesting. But it bugs me that they portray chastity as something no one lives by. I know tons of people who live this way--no sex outside marriage. I'm wondering why the contest wasn't advertized more.

Friday, October 24, 2008
Today's talkers
Virtual 'slaying,' real charges
Mari Yamaguchi / Associated Press

TOKYO -- A 43-year-old player in a virtual game world became so angry about her sudden divorce from her online husband that she logged on with his password and killed his digital persona, police said Thursday.
Go outside, meet real people, communicate in reality.

forgiveness

I was ready for the fight but not ready for it to take place over the internet. He denied everything and refused to apologize and for the second night in a row I went to bed angry. Thumbing through my Rosary, my mind snagged on the line "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." How could I be forgiven for anything if I wasn't willing to forgive him?

In my head I played out a scene where I yell at him and everybody hears and says "look, dude, she's right." I interrupted it with panicked pleas to Christ to help me forgive him and my mind wandered back to yelling at him. I interrupted it with desperate cries to St. Michael to defend me and my mind wandered back to yelling at him. I was already exhausted when I went to bed and I had no energy for this battle. I was awake far later than I had intended.

I woke up in the morning and opened my Bible and there was Matthew 18.

I fought on the walk to Mass. I fought during Mass. I fought when everyone else got up to receive the Eucharist. And I knew there were thousands of people fighting for me.

I knew where to find him, and I waited there for him. I prayed that I would say the right things and that the wrong things would slip my mind. I prayed that his mind would be open and that he would hear what he needed to hear. I felt a fear crawl up and fidget inside my stomach. I recognized the fear: I must be doing the right thing.

I waited.

He came. He saw me. I apologized.

I told him I shouldn't have gotten into that kind of discussion over the internet. I don't think I said anything that wasn't true, but I wouldn't have said it as harshly had I said it in person. I spoke quietly.

He calmly denied everything I had accused him of.

The silence was awkward. After a minute, he disappeared, I think to the bathroom. I picked up my books and left. Once the adrenaline wore off and I was safely out of his sight, I felt my heart shine. Dance. Glow. Sing. Burst.

I had forgiven him.

I tossed my books on a table and ran outside, laughing. I climbed a tree. Giddy. I called Seth and left him a message.

"Seth, I forgave him, I forgave him. He's still an idiot but it's okay because I forgave him. God is wonderful and so are all the saints and thank you for praying for me."

sovereignty

Thursday in Jackson’s class--the ENG-310 with the horrendously long name: Anglo-Saxon and Medieval British Literature--Dr. Jackson told us something about wills and submission:

1. In order to have submit your will to someone else, you must have a will. (This is a tautology.)

2. Submitting your will to someone else is the greatest expression of sovereignty.

I don't know if he's right or not, but I've been thinking. (For a shorter version, skip to "what I learned.")

examples from literature

Last year in another English class with a horrendously long name--Freshman Rhetoric and Great Books II--we read Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. The book is full of suffering, and toward the end, Svidrigailov attempts to rape Dunya. Sparknotes summarizes the scene (part V chapter V) like this:

Svidrigailov lures Dunya to his room...While Dunya becomes faint with anger and confusion, Svidrigailov offers to help Raskolnikov [her brother] avoid punishment if she will marry him. In horror, she runs to the door, only to discover that Svidrigailov has locked it. He threatens to rape her, warning that he can report her brother if she reports him. She pulls out a revolver, threatens him with it, and accuses him of poisoning his late wife. He dares her to fire, and she does, twice, but manages only to graze his temple. Svidrigailov moves to embrace her but, realizing that she will never love him, lets her go. Putting the revolver in his pocket, he goes out shortly thereafter.

Sparknotes doesn't do the scene justice, and I would quote from the book but it's elsewhere, probably Louisville. Sparknotes misses something key: Dunya drops the revolver. We discussed this in class. Dunya drops the revolver, making herself completely vulnerable to Svidrigailov. A moment passes where nothing happens. Svidrigailov stares at the revolver on the ground, one shot left in it. Silence. Svidrigailov runs out of the room.

Something about Dunya's voluntary, willful vulnerability scared the [feces] out of Svidrigailov, and he ran away.

He threatened to rape her--what better way to assert your will, violently, on someone else? The door was locked and, once she dropped the revolver, there was absolutely nothing she could do to stop him. But she was in control of the situation. She submitted her will, and, inasmuch as these things are won and lost, Dunya won.

Something similar happens in the Beowulf movie, and I will tell you and spoil it in order to prevent you from watching the movie. A warrior is about to kill Beowulf (the hero), so Beowulf rips off his armor, piece by piece, walks over and says go ahead, kill me. And the warrior can't do it.

In Jackson's class, we're reading the Canterbury Tales, and today we discussed the Wife of Bath's Tale and the Clerk's Tale.

A superficial reading of the Wife of Bath's Tale says the tale is about what women want most. The Wife of Bath has had an unfortunate number of husbands and--well, she's very beautiful--she uses sex to get what she wants from her current husband. Meta touta, a knight rapes a maiden and the queen's council sentences him to death unless he can figure out what women want most. He eventually finds the Wife of Bath, who by this time is old and ugly. She tells him that she'll answer his question if he promises to comply with her first request. The knight agrees, the Wife whispers in his ear, the knight tells the queen that women's greatest desire is sovereignty, and the Wife requests that the knight marry her. He does so, reluctantly, and in bed that night she gives him two options: she can be ugly and faithful or beautiful with no guarantees about who she's sleeping with. He lets her decide (giving her sovereignty) and she becomes beautiful and faithful (exactly what he wants).

The Clerk's Tale also deals with the issue of sovereignty. The Marquis chooses the daughter of the poorest man in the poorest village to be his wife. She agrees to obey his every wish (whether he makes her laugh or suffer) and to be always happy and never grumble. They have a daughter and he decides to tempt her: he takes away her daughter and leads her to believe her daughter is dead; she bears him a son and he does the same; he sends her back to her father with nothing; he announces that he's to remarry and asks her to plan the wedding. She doesn't bat an eye, doesn't weep, just lets him do what he wants. In the end he marries her again.

what i knew and what i learned

Marriages work best when the husband and wife both submit their wills to each other.

If both parties go into a marriage selfishly, she she will be either manipulative and controlling or passive and clingy; he will be either abusive or a pushover.

There's a difference between being passive and submitting your will. I can't explain it (I tried and failed), but anyone can tell the difference between a man who is genuinely courteous and a man who is genuinely a pushover. A courteous man will do what the woman asks because he wants to please her; a pushover will do what the woman asks because he's afraid of not pleasing her. Or because he wants something.

Courteous men are wonderful, and the mark of a courteous man is that he submits his will without being passive (I think).

I've been topsy-turvy for at least a year trying to figure out how to be a good woman. Ask me how to be a good man, and I would tell you to go read "If" by Rudyard Kipling and the Boy Scout Law. But nobody writes those sorts of things for women.

But the answer is simple. To be a good man, what you have to do is submit your will. To be a good woman, what you have to do is submit your will.

Submit your will. That's all. It's simply a matter of pride.

Simple, but not easy.

I complain that I can't be "helpful" at Hillsdale but I think I'm really complaining that I can't show off how physically strong I am (not that it's much).

I get really offended at woman jokes, but honestly? that's a matter of pride, too.

I get upset when they need volunteers and they have men move tables and women bring food out. That's completely pride.

Submit your will.

First to God.

Second to other people.

But submit it. Humble yourself.

nothing too exciting

workout

Marcellus, who worked ranger staff at camp, was shocked to discover that I go to college.

"You've got an education and you're still doing physical labor?" he asked me.

I didn't know how to respond. Is education a way to avoid physical labor? Is physical labor lower than white collar work?

Saturday mornings at camp are equipment moves. Nick said "It's like getting paid to go to the gym."

I wonder.

Am I going to grow up and get a white-collar job where I don't have to do physical labor then spend my white-collar money on a gym membership because I sit at a desk all day and get out of shape?

army men photos

how we made the army men

I had a request for army man photos, and they will be here right after I show you our dinner. Bob killed a year-old doe on Monday, picked vine-ripened Byron tomatoes on Wednesday, and we feasted Thursday night. We didn't have any spice, so Bob crushed some pringles and added those. I don't even like tomatoes and they were good. Bob Ferberger is a good cook. Jason Middleton is a good tomato washer.






And as requested, the army men. I haven't had a chance to trim or paint them, so they're still a little rough. If anyone knows where I can find enamel paint in very small amounts for cheap, please let me know. (The duck is from the library's table at the Source.)




I thought the backdrop fitting--the flag is from my great-uncle Nick's casket. A real Army man.





These guys (lying down, below) are a little weird. They only have one leg and foot each. Past their waists, it's sort of like a mermaid except with a shoe instead of a tail.





This guy is supposed to have a rifle, but the end if it broke off, so it looks more like a pistol. Bob, Jason, Mike and I thought the way he's standing to shoot looks kind of funny. The only part of the conversation I'm willing to post online is that Jason (the Marine) said he must be a Navy man.




The mold for this guy didn't work very well. This might be the first successful version of him.





This one isn't a guy at all but she found someone's old Marine BDUs at a garage sale.